Girl traps, part three (the risk of being real)

girl orgnageOur smiling, churchy faces—Christian masks, I call them—are hurting us. We chat with visitors, attend Bible studies, sing on praise teams. But sometimes it’s not real.

I’m not saying we don’t love God. And I’m not saying we’re deliberate hypocrites. No, it’s trickier than that: It’s not that we want to hide our struggles, doubts, or fears. We think we have to.

Satan fools us, whispers that good girls don’t spill dirty laundry. If we do, he says, people will judge and reject us. They’ll question our spiritual maturity, our ability to lead. Or worse than that, the Lord will get a black eye. After all, isn’t Christianity supposed to be awesome?

So we clam up, shut down. And as the enemy spreads his poison, we’re hit with a paralyzing doozy: If people know the truth, they won’t accept me.

It’s a lie for sure, one that makes me wonder: Why this trap for girls like you? And what if you escape it? If you remove the mask, once and for all, what are the blessings?

1)   Being real makes you stronger. It’s tough out there, and you need transparency in the trenches. Sharing your heart’s desire helps you practice trust, stay connected, and gain spiritual momentum.

2)   Being real teaches you grace. There’s nothing like revealing something you’re not proud of and hearing a sister say, “I love you just the same, in the name of Jesus.” And she means it.

3)   Being real ignites your purpose. You weren’t saved to pretend a perfect, sinless life. You were saved to proclaim a perfect, merciful Savior. Your flaws make Him accessible and attainable to others.

4)   Being real makes you smarter. When you admit struggles, wise believers are ready with answers and experience. They understand where you are and how to grow challenges into spiritual fruit.

5)   Being real encourages others. Your past valleys are someone’s current despair. When you reveal how God brought you through, there’s reassuring hope and perspective.

Recently, a young woman I know broke free of the trap. As a group of us discussed sin, everyone frowned at its horror. Suddenly brave Kelli spoke up: “This sounds terrible, but sin feels really good. I mean, I kind of like it sometimes, enjoy it, even. Is this awful to admit?”

I wanted to hug her struggling, transparent, honest neck. Now we were getting somewhere. Now we were getting real.


Want to see parts one and two of Girl Traps? Click the links below for past posts:


Any ad appearing under this post is placed by the blog provider, not by Ava Sturgeon.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s