Last night at Bible study, four college ladies admitted it: They are lonely. Really, really lonely. For one reason or another, friends have faded away, disappearing from the radar and leaving behind a deafening silence. Where are the hourly texts? Or those Saturday trips to the mall? What happened to the 24/7 closeness, sharing everything from hairspray to peanut butter?
It’s not supposed to be this way–the loneliness, I mean. The Bible is filled with friends who were there for each other. If you know the stories, then names like David and Jonathan come to mind. Or Paul and Timothy. Oh, and don’t forget Jesus’ most-trusted companions, Peter and John. All these believers had at least one friend who shared their faith, passion, and commitment. Pretty impressive. Pretty important. And, it seems, pretty hard to find.
So where are they hiding, these Christian friends that you desire? Where is the “best friend forever” who’ll pray with you when things go badly? Where is the sister who’ll call you out when that selfish streak appears? Or hang with you on weekends, having the kind of fun that makes your Father smile? If you’re out there, please stand up; young women are desperately searching!
If you’re lonely, then here’s some good news: Almost more than anything, the Father wants you to build relationships with devoted believers (Obviously, the most important relationship is the one between you and God.) And if the Father approves of friendships with devoted believers, then He will surely provide. Just ask. Then seek. And you’ll find.
For what–or for whom–should you pray? Let’s look at some Biblical advice for your God-appointed BFF:
1) God knows your need for a dependable companion: “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, New King James Version).
2) The wrong friends can damage your relationship with God: “The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray” (Proverbs 12:26).
3) You must actively pursue Godly friendships: “A man that has friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24, New King James Version).
Remember the four lonely ladies at Bible study? One of them–we’ll call her Cassie–has turned her life around, and as a result some old friends have turned their backs. Here is her prayer, a plea for Christian friends to scoop her up. If you’re in Cassie’s boat, maybe you’ll pray the same. If you can do the scooping, I pray you’ll reach out to the Cassies and Jennifers and Rachels and Emilys who could use a faithful friend:
I praise your name for loving and protecting me during good days and bad. I thank you for forgetting my past and for paving beautiful paths for my future.
Father, I give you the hurt of my loneliness. It’s hard to see old friendships fade, Lord, and it’s uncomfortable. Help me realize that new relationships are coming and that isolation is disappearing even now, as you begin to work.
Please use this temporary struggle to draw me closer to you. Help me find hope in the Word and in prayer. I pray that even while I’m hurting, this experience will sharpen my awareness of other lonely people. And when those new, healthy, and Godly friendships develop, help me recognize their beautiful worth.
Bring me, your daughter, some happy, healthy, and spiritually strong friends. Drop them on my doorstep. Show me how to make the first move in finding them. Give me wisdom in setting up a loving support system, people I can trust. Friends with whom I can grow. Sisters who accept me in your name. Trusting you always, amen.